Did not post this back when it happened. So posting now.
February 28th 2009 I attended a spirituality retreat out side of Las Vegas at the Methodist Potosi Pines camp. First thing in the morning I got up and took a short walk and did a little meditation. Breakfast was at 8:30 and I met the others in the main building and had a nice relaxing breakfast.
At 9am the program started. Soft guitar music and a slide show presentation where given to help set everyone in a restful mood. The slides were of flowers and really did help. After a bit I closed my eyes to sit and listen to the music. Some people sang and others sat quiet.
While sitting there and moving into a meditative state I began to think about G_d and how I had problems with him. For quite a while now I have been angry with G_d and his absent father motif. As I sat I had an ecstatic experience. I saw a woman approach and knew immediately it was the Shekinah. I could see myself below and she was in the air above me as I looked on from the side. She did not speak a word but held out her hand to me. She was wearing a white or off-white flowing gown that looked almost like a medieval cotehardie. She looked like a northern European and I noticed she had medium blue eyes and a slender face with a small nose. As far as I could tell she also had blonde hair. I wondered at the time why she would not have looked like she came from the Middle East.
She wanted me to go with Her. To take Her hand. I wasn't ready at that point. But I had the distinct impression that Her hand was there for me to take when I was ready.
As I looked at her while she held out her hand I could see her face clearly and wished I was a good enough artist to draw it. The whole scene was very peaceful. I know in real time it took very little time at all but while in the state it seemed to go on for quite a while until the vision faded.
What it all meant I'm not sure but will be meditating on this experience to find what meaning it has to offer.
At times now I wonder if when I take Her hand if I will pass to the next existence. I get this impression at times. But I know that I am totally accepted by Her. Unconditionally.
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Homosexuality and Paul?
Just found out about a new study of Greek and the writings of Paul on the subject of homosexuality. I have always maintained that his denouncing of homosexuality was for homosexual rituals or the exploitation of slaves. Some new study on this helps to confirm my belief. Check out the following:
Internationally Acclaimed Cryptographer Cracks 2000-Year-Old Biblical Paradox, Finding the Apostle Paul Accepted Christian Homosexuals
Internationally Acclaimed Cryptographer Cracks 2000-Year-Old Biblical Paradox, Finding the Apostle Paul Accepted Christian Homosexuals
Monday, November 7, 2011
First realwinter snows
The past few days we've been getting our first real winter snows. Not sure I am ready yet. Sigh. LOL
Except for the cold I do like snow. It is so clean and fresh after the ground is covered with the white.
I am continuing along with the Paleo Diet. I fall off the wagon every now and then but trying to get down below 200 lbs. I'm at 214 and want to lose another 4 lbs before I go in for a stress test in a couple of weeks. My son T is impressed with some of the info we have from the book the Paleo Diet for Athletes. I think I may be able to get him to eat a little better. If we do it together it will be easier. Athletes can augment their diet with carbs because of their high energy expenditure.
Except for the cold I do like snow. It is so clean and fresh after the ground is covered with the white.
I am continuing along with the Paleo Diet. I fall off the wagon every now and then but trying to get down below 200 lbs. I'm at 214 and want to lose another 4 lbs before I go in for a stress test in a couple of weeks. My son T is impressed with some of the info we have from the book the Paleo Diet for Athletes. I think I may be able to get him to eat a little better. If we do it together it will be easier. Athletes can augment their diet with carbs because of their high energy expenditure.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Ran across this quote...
"It happens all the time in heaven,
And some day
It will begin to happen
Again on earth -
That men and women who are married,
And men and men who are
Lovers,
And women and women
Who give each other
Light,
Often will get down on their knees
And while so tenderly
Holding their lover's hand,
With tears in their eyes,
Will sincerely speak, saying,
"My dear,
How can I be more loving to you;
How can I be more
Kind?"
--Hafiz (died ~1388 A.D.)
And some day
It will begin to happen
Again on earth -
That men and women who are married,
And men and men who are
Lovers,
And women and women
Who give each other
Light,
Often will get down on their knees
And while so tenderly
Holding their lover's hand,
With tears in their eyes,
Will sincerely speak, saying,
"My dear,
How can I be more loving to you;
How can I be more
Kind?"
--Hafiz (died ~1388 A.D.)
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Letting go
Letting go is a very important concept. When we hold things in for too long they can start to fester and then explode out in unproductive ways.
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Dreams
So last night I killed a man in my dreams. Something bubbling nicely to the surface.
Dawn.
I see the other standing there. White shirt. Sword in hand. Our seconds are somewhere. We approach each other. Watching each other. Looking for the tell tale sign of attack.
He moves quickly at me and tries to cut the left side of my neck I parry and push my point past his head and draw it back sharply cutting his cheek to the bone. I think to myself. Now how will the ladies like you?
He steps back as my blade fillets his face and then I methodically start my advance. I strike left and right. Blade wheeling and cascading towards him. He just barely defends each stroke. On one cut to his left cheek I slide my blade off his and then thrust to his right eyes. He raises his hand too far as I knew he would and I step quickly to the right and turning my hand I avoid his defense and cut deeply into his right thigh.
He turns as best as he can and throws a blow to my left neck again. I cut into his attack driving his sword down and away from me. I stand there. Looking at him. Grinning. He swings his sword in a wild arc desperately trying to kill me or at least drive me off for a moment. I raise my sword and catch his blade near my guard and I drive the point forward over his arm to his chest. I can feel the steel start to sink in and his eyes go wide. I press further and he tries to back up as he staggers. I step forward and grasp his should and give one last push. I can see his eyes. He looks at me almost as if he would say something and then the light goes out in his eyes. He is gone. Finally gone.
Dawn.
I see the other standing there. White shirt. Sword in hand. Our seconds are somewhere. We approach each other. Watching each other. Looking for the tell tale sign of attack.
He moves quickly at me and tries to cut the left side of my neck I parry and push my point past his head and draw it back sharply cutting his cheek to the bone. I think to myself. Now how will the ladies like you?
He steps back as my blade fillets his face and then I methodically start my advance. I strike left and right. Blade wheeling and cascading towards him. He just barely defends each stroke. On one cut to his left cheek I slide my blade off his and then thrust to his right eyes. He raises his hand too far as I knew he would and I step quickly to the right and turning my hand I avoid his defense and cut deeply into his right thigh.
He turns as best as he can and throws a blow to my left neck again. I cut into his attack driving his sword down and away from me. I stand there. Looking at him. Grinning. He swings his sword in a wild arc desperately trying to kill me or at least drive me off for a moment. I raise my sword and catch his blade near my guard and I drive the point forward over his arm to his chest. I can feel the steel start to sink in and his eyes go wide. I press further and he tries to back up as he staggers. I step forward and grasp his should and give one last push. I can see his eyes. He looks at me almost as if he would say something and then the light goes out in his eyes. He is gone. Finally gone.
Saturday, July 2, 2011
The Tapestry of life
It is amazing how things weave themselves into ones life. A chance encounter that sparks something. Sets one on another track. Or brings out something that causes introspection and then change. Life should be experienced and reveled in. Not feared. Not wasted.
When people come into our lives, do we give back? Do we share fully with them or do we hold something back?
Do we allow ourselves to be touched? To share? Do we allow people in?
Spirituality to me is the ability to open ourselves and commune with others. To do that we need to let them in.
When people come into our lives, do we give back? Do we share fully with them or do we hold something back?
Do we allow ourselves to be touched? To share? Do we allow people in?
Spirituality to me is the ability to open ourselves and commune with others. To do that we need to let them in.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Great quote
"If the glory of God is intelligence...then asking questions is the truest path." - Janice
This really is true. If there is a God, he/she/it then made us the way we are, intelligence included. It also made us with our sexual drives and gender identity. That being the case, why penalize us for using our brains and wanting someone to love, even if they are of the same gender as we are?
This really is true. If there is a God, he/she/it then made us the way we are, intelligence included. It also made us with our sexual drives and gender identity. That being the case, why penalize us for using our brains and wanting someone to love, even if they are of the same gender as we are?
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Life
I am a child of nature. This is not a bad thing as some religions would tell you. This makes me part of the world around me.
How can I live in this world and help to take care of it without sensing that connection to it?
How can I experience life without touching nature, communing with all that lives around me, loving those I come in contact with?
How can I?
I am. Simply. I am. What more can one say?
If we can truly figure out who "I am" is, and I am not talking about any kind of god, but who we truly are, perhaps we can figure out how to fit within the world around us.
I am a humanist. An agnostic. A lover of nature and my fellow homo sapiens.
What are you?
How can I live in this world and help to take care of it without sensing that connection to it?
How can I experience life without touching nature, communing with all that lives around me, loving those I come in contact with?
How can I?
I am. Simply. I am. What more can one say?
If we can truly figure out who "I am" is, and I am not talking about any kind of god, but who we truly are, perhaps we can figure out how to fit within the world around us.
I am a humanist. An agnostic. A lover of nature and my fellow homo sapiens.
What are you?
Sunday, May 22, 2011
What is it about humans that they need magical thinking?
Well the hubub of the Rapture Day and subsequent lack of rapture on May 21st is just another example of magical thinking not working. People have lost their savings, alienated family and damn near died just because of this magical thinking. When will homo sapiens move past magical thinking and relegate god to the same status of Santa?
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
The Wisdom of Frank Zappa
"My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can." — Frank Zappa
Friday, April 29, 2011
Apologetics?
Why are apologetics necessary? I was thinking about that today. My take is that they are necessary to defend the indefensible and to maintain a magic mindset. When religion and science collide the normal person off the street may start to question. So up pops the apologist to explain things away using circular logic and pseudoscience so the lay person can feel good about their religion again.
If a religion is true it should stand the test of time and should not conflict with science. That is, it should not conflict with the geographic record, the archaeological record, biology,etc.
As I have said before, if God hides things he is a trickster and not worth worshipping.
If a religion is true it should stand the test of time and should not conflict with science. That is, it should not conflict with the geographic record, the archaeological record, biology,etc.
As I have said before, if God hides things he is a trickster and not worth worshipping.
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Stress
Why do we let things get to us. Or specifically why do I let things get to me. The director of the department I work in made me out to be a terrible person in front of the rest of the people int he department. It stressed me out so bad that I began to have stress induced angina. It happened before the class I teach and I had to sit for a little while in the locker room shaking before I could go to teach. I don't know why it affected me as much as it did. Maybe because after problems in the past and extensive talk with a third party I thought things were good. The person is plain socially inept. Luckily I am not the only one who thinks so. Others in the department have stated the same thing.
Its two days later now and I feel better. It happened on a Thursday and I told my supervisor I was not coming back to work till after Easter.
So what makes the physiological affect that I had?
Its two days later now and I feel better. It happened on a Thursday and I told my supervisor I was not coming back to work till after Easter.
So what makes the physiological affect that I had?
Friday, April 15, 2011
What kind of liberal am I?
My Liberal Identity
You are a Reality-Based Intellectualist, also known as the liberal elite. You are a proud member of what’s known as the reality-based community, where science, reason, and non-Jesus-based thought reign supreme.
Take the quiz at
About.com Political Humor
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Magical Thinking
I'll be blunt. Religion can kill. Yeah yeah. We know that only people kill people (or nature etc). How can religion kill people? By the belief in the magical mindset.
A friend was recounting a poor mother who had cancer and instead of getting proper care she used homeopathic treatments and prayer. Guess what? She has two weeks to live.
Such is the problem with magical thinking. As we know, magic is all smoke and mirrors. It is a deception. And unfortunately the people who buy into this magical mindset as it comes to religion are the ones that suffer in the end. My heart goes out to the children of this woman who will be indoctrinated into this same mindset.
Religion kills.
A friend was recounting a poor mother who had cancer and instead of getting proper care she used homeopathic treatments and prayer. Guess what? She has two weeks to live.
Such is the problem with magical thinking. As we know, magic is all smoke and mirrors. It is a deception. And unfortunately the people who buy into this magical mindset as it comes to religion are the ones that suffer in the end. My heart goes out to the children of this woman who will be indoctrinated into this same mindset.
Religion kills.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
So here I am... Thinking about apologists
I ran across an interesting way of describing the difference between apologists and critics. I'm rephrasing it (i.e. eating the book and making it my own...) to bring out my take on it.
A Mormon apologist wrote an article entitled 'What critics don't understand' ... The article implies that critics cannot understand the position of believers. That the "spirit" is the true test of knowledge. But is this a valid epistemological undertaking or belief?
The apologist or believer relies upon their testimony for "truth." Despite what the facts may say to the contrary.
And so the critics do understand this. And many critics were once in the same position, but let reason trump testimony. Critics understand that testimony is subjective, emotional, and lacking in reason. What the apologists and believers do not understand is that they are lacking reason, understanding and objectivity.
A Mormon apologist wrote an article entitled 'What critics don't understand' ... The article implies that critics cannot understand the position of believers. That the "spirit" is the true test of knowledge. But is this a valid epistemological undertaking or belief?
The apologist or believer relies upon their testimony for "truth." Despite what the facts may say to the contrary.
And so the critics do understand this. And many critics were once in the same position, but let reason trump testimony. Critics understand that testimony is subjective, emotional, and lacking in reason. What the apologists and believers do not understand is that they are lacking reason, understanding and objectivity.
Monday, March 21, 2011
More disappointment
Well last week my heart procedure failed. They could not remove the blockage from my RCA. And then in recovery my left femoral blew. They had to quickly put this painful device on me to keep me from bleeding out. I ended up laying flat for close to 10 hours. My back hurt so bad I wanted to cry. And now I am walking funny and am bruised from my navel to my knee on my left side. And it hurts.
The doc wants to try again but I don't know if I want to. Sometimes I'd like to just lay down and not wake up.
The doc wants to try again but I don't know if I want to. Sometimes I'd like to just lay down and not wake up.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Disappointment
How do we deal with disappointment?
I have always used food in the past to deal with stress and disappointment. This time around I'm not going to. But what to fill the void not eating? This is always the hard part. So, will try to use exercise to do that as I am desparately trying to lose weight.
I have read quite a bit about low carb diets. I started one about a month agoand then got sick. Before getting sick I had actually started to lose weight. My friend Sandi told me about a program begun by a group of trainers who appear to have done their homework. They have a book and consulting and i will give their system a try. A consulting cardiologist that I have seen advised me to use a low carb diet. Apparently diets rich in carbs, which is what I was on, leads to diabetes and all sorts of problems. Especially with a lot of sugars. So am giving the low carb a try.
And keeping a positive outlook.
I have always used food in the past to deal with stress and disappointment. This time around I'm not going to. But what to fill the void not eating? This is always the hard part. So, will try to use exercise to do that as I am desparately trying to lose weight.
I have read quite a bit about low carb diets. I started one about a month agoand then got sick. Before getting sick I had actually started to lose weight. My friend Sandi told me about a program begun by a group of trainers who appear to have done their homework. They have a book and consulting and i will give their system a try. A consulting cardiologist that I have seen advised me to use a low carb diet. Apparently diets rich in carbs, which is what I was on, leads to diabetes and all sorts of problems. Especially with a lot of sugars. So am giving the low carb a try.
And keeping a positive outlook.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Hawaiian pidgin English Lord's prayer
"God, you our Fadda.
You stay inside da sky.
We like all da peopo know fo shua how you stay,
An dat you stay good an spesho,
An we like dem give you plenny respeck.
We like you come King fo everybody now.
We like everybody make jalike you like,
Ova hea inside da world,
Jalike da angel guys up inside da sky make jalike you like.
Give us da food we need fo today an every day.
Hemmo our shame, an let us go
Fo all da kine bad stuff we do to you,
Jalike us guys let da odda guys go awready,
And we no stay huhu wit dem
Fo all da kine bad stuff dey do to us.
No let us get chance fo do bad kine stuff,
But take us outa dea, so da Bad Guy no can hurt us.
Cuz you our King.
You get da real power,
An you stay awesome foeva.
Dass it!"
You stay inside da sky.
We like all da peopo know fo shua how you stay,
An dat you stay good an spesho,
An we like dem give you plenny respeck.
We like you come King fo everybody now.
We like everybody make jalike you like,
Ova hea inside da world,
Jalike da angel guys up inside da sky make jalike you like.
Give us da food we need fo today an every day.
Hemmo our shame, an let us go
Fo all da kine bad stuff we do to you,
Jalike us guys let da odda guys go awready,
And we no stay huhu wit dem
Fo all da kine bad stuff dey do to us.
No let us get chance fo do bad kine stuff,
But take us outa dea, so da Bad Guy no can hurt us.
Cuz you our King.
You get da real power,
An you stay awesome foeva.
Dass it!"
Monday, February 21, 2011
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Religion
Quotes by MIKHAIL BAKUNIN,
All religions, with their gods, their demi-gods, and their prophets, their messiahs and their saints, were created by the prejudiced fancy of men who had not attained the full development and full possession of their faculties.
Freedom, morality, and the human dignity of the individual consists precisely in this; that he does good not because he is forced to do so, but because he freely conceives it, wants it, and loves it.
From the naturalistic point of view, all men are equal. There are only two exceptions to this rule of naturalistic equality: geniuses and idiots.
He who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
People go to church for the same reasons they go to a tavern: to stupefy themselves, to forget their misery, to imagine themselves, for a few minutes anyway, free and happy.
The first revolt is against the supreme tyranny of theology, of the phantom of God. As long as we have a master in heaven, we will be slaves on earth.
All religions, with their gods, their demi-gods, and their prophets, their messiahs and their saints, were created by the prejudiced fancy of men who had not attained the full development and full possession of their faculties.
Freedom, morality, and the human dignity of the individual consists precisely in this; that he does good not because he is forced to do so, but because he freely conceives it, wants it, and loves it.
From the naturalistic point of view, all men are equal. There are only two exceptions to this rule of naturalistic equality: geniuses and idiots.
He who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
People go to church for the same reasons they go to a tavern: to stupefy themselves, to forget their misery, to imagine themselves, for a few minutes anyway, free and happy.
The first revolt is against the supreme tyranny of theology, of the phantom of God. As long as we have a master in heaven, we will be slaves on earth.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Monday, January 31, 2011
Light at the end of the tunnel?
Since my surgery in December, I have had increased energy, less angina and have been able to do more. They placed two stents in my circumflex and my surgeon is going to work on my right coronary in March. If they can fix that one too then I will be in really good shape for a while. I just then needs to keep the arteries clear.
Sometimes I wonder why we have to go thru things like this? Just the luck of the draw?
Sometimes I wonder why we have to go thru things like this? Just the luck of the draw?
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Mormon Morality
Another good quote today by Stephen Fonnesbeck.
"The whole fantasy of virtue as it's applied to sexual virginity is more important in the church than, moral excellence; goodness; righteousness; conformity of one's life and conduct to moral and ethical principles; uprightness; rectitude or just simply not being a lying cheating bastard. No, with the church, it's all about SEX! As if sex is the end all be all of morality. When ever I hear the word morals spoken of by anyone in the chruch, they are automatically talking about sex."
"The whole fantasy of virtue as it's applied to sexual virginity is more important in the church than, moral excellence; goodness; righteousness; conformity of one's life and conduct to moral and ethical principles; uprightness; rectitude or just simply not being a lying cheating bastard. No, with the church, it's all about SEX! As if sex is the end all be all of morality. When ever I hear the word morals spoken of by anyone in the chruch, they are automatically talking about sex."
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Uniforms
In regards to the Mormon Church's dress codes I saw the following quote by Matt Elggren:
"The uniform for men is an expression of their alignment with authority. The uniform for women is an expression of their submission to authority."
"The uniform for men is an expression of their alignment with authority. The uniform for women is an expression of their submission to authority."
Monday, January 3, 2011
Shekhina
Back in 2009 I had an interesting experience.
Here is what I wrote last night about the experience.
February 28th 2009 I attended a spirituality retreat out side of Las Vegas at the Methodist Potosi Pines camp. First thing in the morning I got up and took a short walk and did a little meditation. Breakfast was at 8:30 and I met the others in the main building and had a nice relaxing breakfast.
At 9am the program started. Soft guitar music and a slide show presentation where given to help set everyone in a restful mood. The slides were of flowers and really did help. After a bit I closed my eyes to sit and listen to the music. Some people sang and others sat quiet.
While sitting there and moving into a meditative state I began to think about G_d and how I had problems with him. For quite a while now I have been angry with G_d and his absent father motif. As I sat I had an ecstatic experience. I saw a woman approach and knew immediately it was the Shekinah. I could see myself below and she was in the air above me as I looked on from the side. She did not speak a word but held out her hand to me. She was wearing a white or off-white flowing gown that looked almost like a medieval cotehardie. She looked like a northern European and I noticed she had medium blue eyes and a slender face with a small nose. As far as I could tell she also had blonde hair. I wondered at the time why she would not have looked like she came from the Middle East.
As I looked at her while she held out her hand I could see her face clearly and wished I was a good enough artist to draw it. The whole scene was very peaceful. I know in real time it took very little time at all but while in the state it seemed to go on for quite a while until the vision faded.
What it all meant I'm not sure but will be meditating on this experience to find what meaning it has to offer.
Here is what I wrote last night about the experience.
February 28th 2009 I attended a spirituality retreat out side of Las Vegas at the Methodist Potosi Pines camp. First thing in the morning I got up and took a short walk and did a little meditation. Breakfast was at 8:30 and I met the others in the main building and had a nice relaxing breakfast.
At 9am the program started. Soft guitar music and a slide show presentation where given to help set everyone in a restful mood. The slides were of flowers and really did help. After a bit I closed my eyes to sit and listen to the music. Some people sang and others sat quiet.
While sitting there and moving into a meditative state I began to think about G_d and how I had problems with him. For quite a while now I have been angry with G_d and his absent father motif. As I sat I had an ecstatic experience. I saw a woman approach and knew immediately it was the Shekinah. I could see myself below and she was in the air above me as I looked on from the side. She did not speak a word but held out her hand to me. She was wearing a white or off-white flowing gown that looked almost like a medieval cotehardie. She looked like a northern European and I noticed she had medium blue eyes and a slender face with a small nose. As far as I could tell she also had blonde hair. I wondered at the time why she would not have looked like she came from the Middle East.
As I looked at her while she held out her hand I could see her face clearly and wished I was a good enough artist to draw it. The whole scene was very peaceful. I know in real time it took very little time at all but while in the state it seemed to go on for quite a while until the vision faded.
What it all meant I'm not sure but will be meditating on this experience to find what meaning it has to offer.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)